Guys, I'm ALONE. Not in the despair-filled, we're-all-ultimately-alone-in-this-life sense, but in the literal, concrete sense. I spent my first night away from M and E last night and it was glorious and bittersweet in equal measure. After a good 45 minutes of looking at pictures of M on my phone and missing him ferociously, I spun around The-Hills-Are-Alive style in my room before falling asleep in my hotel bathrobe at 10:30.

It's a funny time to be away and probably a good test of my anxiety coping skills. After M's injury last week, I'm feeling more protective of him than ever, so this is forcing me to deal with the lingering fear that SOMETHING WILL HAPPEN. Because something will happen eventually- it always does. Although last week I felt panicked realizing that I can't always protect M, I'm trying to remember that I AM protecting him by giving him life skills and resilience and by not hovering and sending him the message that I don't trust him and that the world is filled with danger. Also, his dad is the greatest, so I really need to chill out. 

Anyhoo, this is my first post in some time that wasn't interrupted by a small person with constant demands OR exhaustion from addressing said small person's constant demands. So without further ado: Delicious black bean soup!

A few notes: 15 minutes is a long time for onions to start a soup, but the caramelizing really enhances the flavor of this simple dish. Also, this soup is of a medium thickness. If one wanted a thicker soup, reduce the liquid by 1 cup. Similarly, to thin the soup further, add 1/2 to 1 cup more liquid. I like the textural difference of some pureed and some whole beans, but one could also puree the whole thing for a uniform consistency. Other ways to add texture: Set side some caramelized onions for later topping; add in a small can of poblanos or other roasted, chopped green chilis; top with crushed tortilla chips, cojita cheese, cilantro, chopped tomatoes, etc for faux nachos on top.

Black bean soup

1 Tbsp olive oil
1 Tbsp butter
1 medium onion, chopped
4 large cloves garlic
1 tsp oregano
½ tsp cumin
1/8-¼ tsp cayenne
2 cans black beans, drained and rinsed
4 cups chicken stock
S/P

Heat olive oil and butter over a medium flame. Add the chopped onion and cook, stirring occasionally, until browned and caramelized, about 15-20 minutes. Add the garlic and spices and cook for 2-3 minutes, or until fragrant.

Add 1.5 cans of black beans and chicken stock and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low and simmer, covered, for 30 minutes. Let cool slightly, and using an immersion or regular blender, puree the soup. Add the other .5 cans of beans, salt and pepper to taste, and heat through again.

Yield: 50 oz or about 5 cups